Communication and Miscommunication

On Sunday morning, I woke up to a message on my answering machine. It sounded something like this: "Hi Drennan. . .wah wah wah [insert the noises the adults on the Peanuts make]. . .this is wah wah. . .wah wah wah wah wah would love to talk to you wah wah wah." And that was all I could make out. The caller sounded like a female voice. And she didn't leave a number. Now clearly, I have no idea who this was. And I think that the message was possibly left in the wee hours, although it's difficult to say for sure--the power had gone out the night before, and I know that my time stamp thingy was off. So. . .if you left a message on my landline, and I never called back, please call again. It's best to call my cell number if you have it. I feel bad and a little concerned about the whole thing.

Also, this just in. Recently, I have had several people mention things like they wish I had a myspace or that they requested me as a myspace friend and that I ignored. So I've decided that, in the interest of communication, I will start being more active with the old myspace account.

"Pull This Thread As I Walk Away:" Altered Tees and Why They Don't Unravel

Ok, let me say, first, that I think this is a really unflattering picture of me. However, it shows the lace up back of my latest altered tee, which I think is kinda fun. And here's an explanation for C. about why I think this sort of thing can be done without sewing, why it shouldn't unravel. Some of you know that I actually like to sew and while I'm not a brilliant seamstress, I'm not bad. However, sometimes a no-sew project is kinda fun. This particular tee is done by cutting off lengths from the bottom of the tee, poking holes along the scoop back and lacing the lengths from the bottom across. This was a scoop back to begin with, but a regular tee could be cut into this shape. I've borrowed and modified ideas from the book Generation T--108 Ways to Transform a T-Shirt, which is kinda fun and has good ideas. I've left the bottom, where I've cut off a strip unfinished, and the holes I've punched with a craft knife are unfinished too. The kind of knit that the tee is should not unravel--I think it's called a jersey knit. A woven fabric wouldn't work this way and would have to be finished in some way, usually with a hem. I think that the nature of the knit is that the ends and even the little holes just stay the way they are. If you get a small hole in a tee or a polo shirt, it's rather unattractive, possibly, but it doesn't tend to get any bigger. The edge will just kinda curl up a bit, but it works fine. I do think it would look good if the little holes that the band is laced through were finished either with a grommet or an eyelet thingy. But I don't have an eyelet / grommet setter that will work on fabric. But it seems like that would be a fun detail if one wanted a more finished look and wanted to spend a bit more time. It's certainly not a polished look, but it works for casual. This is a purchased tee, and one great thing about it is that it says "Jet Setter" across the front, although you can't see it in this pic. But I just think that's funny. Anyway, I like the idea of wearing clothing that somehow reflects my creativity and all that, so this sort of thing appeals to me, even if it is somewhat trashy and not terribly age appropriate.

This shirt I bought for 3.99. Mostly, I bought it for the color. Again, with nothing but the magic scissors and a craft knife, it becomes something much more interesting. It's much cuter on, I have to say.

More Altered Clothing

Here, a boring purple tee finds new life with the addition of a little ribbon. I like this because the cut up tee is kinda punk, but the green and purple make it girly.

Altered Tees

Ok, so here's my new thing. Here you see a boring black tee. But with my magic scissors, and a few embellishments, it becomes something punky and much more fun. I know that the pic isn't that great, but you get the idea.

More Insomnia

I wonder if blogging about insomnia is somehow generating more insomnia in the world. But last night was another night plagued by the specter of insomnia. Earlier in the day, I went to the pharmacy and bought some sort of homeopathic thing that is supposed to help with sleep. I followed the directions carefully, yet it didn't seem to help at all. Lately, I seem to be able to get to sleep. But I only sleep for like 45 minutes and then am wide awake for hours. Last night, I tried all my old tricks: counting backwards from 300, listening to my iPod, deep breathing. None of it seemed to help. I kept thinking about how I was in the house all alone and how if there were an intruder I probably wouldn't realize it and how if I were to scream no one would hear. I do realize that obsessing about this stuff isn't rational and certainly isn't helpful. But there it was. Yesterday, I also had my annual visit to the gynecologist--woo hoo! That "woo hoo" was sarcasm, by the way. Anyway, sitting in the waiting room felt so weird yesterday, and last night in bed, it was like I kept flashing back to the whole waiting room scene. I felt like I was surrounded by these hugely preganant women; they looked ready to pop. And there they were with men I assume were the fathers of their children. OK, I know this is a terrible thing to think, but they all just looked like they wouldn't be good parents. I realize that, among other things, that's totally classist of me, but I kept thinking, "Why should they get to have a baby?" I feel awful for thinking these things. Then there were several teenagers in the waiting room, waiting to be tested for STIs and to get birth control, no doubt. I've been to the gyno a lot over the past year, and it seems like every time, there's some sort of drama with a 15 or 16 year old girl who either forgot her parents' insurance card or is being chewed out because she missed her last five appointments or whatever. And something about it just freaks me out. I always somehow feel like the pregnant women are being given the VIP treatment and the teenagers are getting lots of attention and I'm persona non grata, as they say. Again, I realize that most of this is in my imagination, but that perception is still there. And I kept thinking and thinking about it all in bed last night. And now I'm to the point in this whole cycle of insomnia where I'm starting to dread going to bed each night. Here it is, only 10:00am, and I'm already worried about going to bed. It's all just maddening!

Jasper Fforde's Thursday Next Series

Last week, I went to the local library, which is really quite a fine library for a small community. While there, I discovered the latest novel in Fforde's Thursday Next series. So I decided that before I read the fifth and most recent novel in the series, I'd reread the first four. So now, I'm on The Well of Lost Plots. And I'm trying to put my finger on what it is that makes this series so entertaining. First, I like that one gets the feeling that Fforde really loves literature but doesn't take it or himself too seriously. There's something wonderful and fun and funny about his play with language and his use of parody. For example, in the fourth in the series, Something Rotten, Hamlet appears as a character who's been transported from Shakespeare's play to Thursday's England, this crazy, alternate England where everyone is all into literature. Anyway, Hamlet is having this identity crisis, which seems somehow apt. And he goes out and rents all these videos with different film adaptations of Hamlet. He can't decide if he wants to be more like Sir Laurence Olivier's Hamlet or Mel Gibson's. And it goes on and on--he analyzes the merits of each, asks others for their opinions. And there's something really funny and absurd but also nearly true, somehow, in all this. And it's indicative of what Fforde does throughout the series. It's all really wonderful. I also recommend Fforde's Nursery Crimes series. It's good light reading. It's funny and clever and not predictable. Fforde is all-round entertainment for English majors.

Insomnia

So last night was not good. I got in bed around 11:00, read until 11:30 or so, turned the lights out, slept for maybe 45 minutes, then was wide awake until nearly 3:30. This morning, I slept until 9:30ish. And now, 45 minutes later, I feel like crap, absolute crap. I feel like I've been out with the dry cows, as some might say. And it drives me crazy when I can't sleep. Seriously, if there is a purgatory, and if it isn't LAX, then it must be insomnia. Truly. So I watched TV--there's not much good on at 2:00am--and read for a while. Mostly, I worried about what the next day would be like and how late I could afford to sleep in without lowering the chances for the next night's sleep. I've had issues from sleep for as long as I can remember, certainly since I was 6. And some nights I sleep fine, but others it's just so miserable. And I never quite know what to do. It all produces anxiety. I've read somewhere that there's a theory that insomnia is about the fear of not being able to fall asleep; for me, fear, or more properly anxiety, feeds it, that's for sure. Because you sit there all anxious about what's going to happen if you don't get enough sleep and anxious about what you should do to promote sleep, and I certainly am not going to drink warm milk--ick! But last night, at about 2:30 I spent a lot of time debating whether or not to get up and take a bath. I guess that I'm thankful that I'm not disturbing anyone else, except for maybe Polly. But it was a truly miserable night.

After a hiatus, I'm back, back to the blogosphere. I wish I had fun, exciting stuff to report, but I don't. Things have been chugging along in a mostly normal, quiet fashion. I was scheduled to start teaching summer school yesterday, but my courses were canceled due to low enrollment. I do have to say that I'm disappointed. I have decided to make use of all the extra time to get some reading and writing done, which is good I suppose. I've also had the time and inclination to practice yoga more than I normally might. I don't think yoga is some miracle cure, but I know that for me, it makes a difference in a number of areas of my life. Lately, I'm using Cyndi Lee's OM Yoga in a Box. She has several books out that are also quite helpful. She does a good job of explaining the postures. Also I'd totally recommend yin yoga to anyone who's looking to really relax and chill out; I've been using the CD and cards that come with Biff Mithoefer's The Yin Yoga Kit . So there, I suppose, are my yoga recommendations. I have other CDs and DVDs that I use also, but these two are the ones I've been using most lately.

I have to say that I'm really enjoying the time off work. In the past, I've always had trouble with more than about a week off work--I tend to get anxious and depressed. But for the past couple of weeks, I've been enjoying sleeping in and reading and watching movies and simply having time to relax. I am so relieved that I seem to be able to handle it.

Anyway, that's an update on me--nothing to exciting or even interesting, I'm afraid. What was it that Tolkien said? Something about how the days that are most pleasant to live are not very interesting to tell about. So that clearly wasn't verbatim, but you get the idea.